Category Archives: enCave

All english posts are to be found here in the english Cave.

5 Broken Cameras


I finally watched it, I am ashamed to say, with all the opportunities I have had.
Muslims wherever they are, whether in the Philippines or in Palestine are close to my heart. So I ask myself if I am truly truthful, what have I done for them?

As Muslims we are told to be like a singular body, the Prophet saw. said:

“The similitude of a believer in regard to mutual love, affection, fellow-feeling is that of a body; when any limb of it aches, the whole body aches, because of sleeplessness and fever.”

So what if you were able to remove the pain somehow, or at least help to lessen it, wouldn’t you do whatever is necessary to relieve yourself of the pain? Wouldn’t you do whatever comes to your mind, even old house remedies, to reduce the sleeplessness and fever?

I ask myself, what have I done to relieve the aches in any of my limbs ? At this moment in time I’m asleep, I have forgotten the pain. I let it become worse and didn’t seek out any help, even though it was offered to me.

I have seen many clips and documentaries on the Palestinian-Israeli conflict before, but 5 broken cameras is different. Different in that it gives us a view of the normal life of a family in Bil’in. We witness how the son (Gibreel) of the film-maker (Emad Burnat ) grows up, one of his first words being “wall” and “army”.

One of the most saddening parts of the film is when Gibreel (4 at the time) asks, “Daddy, why don’t you kill the soldiers with a knife?”. Emad tells us, “We all lose our childhood at one point.” We gain an insight into life in the village and their struggle through his lenses.

These are my brothers and sisters in Islam, Jibreel is just around a year older than my own little sister. I felt like crying at the loss of his innocence. I can’t imagine how hard it must be as a father to live through that and teach your child what it means to live and die.

Imagine your own brother, your sister, someone you feel close to, only know the inside of a cage. A cage which over the years continues to shrink more and more.

Whereas seeing the sea, is nothing special for us. Freedom, something we take for granted. We are not being killed or shot at by soldiers for trying to lay a claim on what is ours. We aren’t beaten up by settlers taking our land.

“Clinging to non-violent ideals is not easy, when death is all around you”, Emad tells us in his monotone voice, “When someone dies anger grows”. Especially when that someone is close to you, like Bessam Abu Rahmeh was to him.

“So I film to heal…It helps me to confront life.”

The film won a Sundance film festival award and was also nominated for an Oscar (Mar 2013).  I have a lot of respect for him and the Palestinian people in general. 

May Allah swt. give them strength,  an end to this struggle and Jannatul Firdaws to the martyrs.

May Allah swt. give me the strength and courage to stop being just a once in a while slacktivist and do something for change however small it is.


Wa Salam,


Swearing for Charity

Heart beating faster, taking in a shallow shaking breath as you’re running from one side of the pitch to the other. Voices calling to each other ‘Man on’. Your mind just occupied with that next shot.

The ball is coming nearer, a pass across and it’s yours. You prepare to accept it, striding towards it. The football hits the side of your foot, a perfect  pass. Now needing to convert it into a goal standing now just a couple steps away from the goal outside the box.

You’re going to make it count, the scenarios have all played out in your head. There’s no way this isn’t going to be a goal. Leg raised back into the air. Suddenly you hear a slushing behind you, grass parting, dirt flying into the air.

The attacker missed the ball, but his foot carried on its journey colliding with your other foot. You fall over clutching your leg, referee didn’t look. Game’s still on.

You however you’re lying there wondering where your chance went, cursing up a storm about your injury, that doesn’t hurt anymore. The unfairness of it all.

The steam, your anger must be vented. You’re not about to start a fight, we’re among brothers after all. So you settle for swearing.

10 minutes after the game you’re still talking, discussing what happened, how the referee was so useless.

You’ve calmed down now, reflecting on the game, your anger, your swearing.

…I need to work on my temper when playing football…

Just came back from playing in a football tournament organised by the Isoc for Charity Week. We had 20 teams in total, it cost £42 per team to take part.

Well we lost all of our games. the competition was very good, but we also never played together as a team before.

It generally served me as a reminder, a reminder to keep calm in tough situations, in heated situations, in competitive situations. To work on myself and my temper.

When playing football it’s easy to let something slip, to let the frustration, your anger manifest itself in that way.

Swearing is normal in our society, so normal that it is a strategy, to raise for charity through it. For every profanity used you put something in a swear box. There even is an online version for twitter users at charityswearbox.

Swearing is not something that is condoned in Islam. Islam lays a lot of importance on character building so the Prophet saw. tells us:

 “It is not the character of a believer to indulge in slandering, cursing, or immoral talk.” (Tirmidhi)

As Muslims we have to realise that whatever we do, whatever we say is going to be written by the scribes that Allah swt. has appointed to us. I’ll let Shaykh Kamal El-Mekki expand on that.

May Allah swt. the All-Knowing and All-Hearing forgive us for our lapses. May He swt. help us in guarding our tongues.


Wa Salam,



Videos? Love ’em II

My favourite love em’ video this week in the non-Islamic Category is:

A tie between Independence and When Dreams change.

My favourite love em’ video this week in the Islamic Category is:

How Am I Going To Serve Allah? – Ustadh Nouman Ali Khan

First, I have to say that although I haven’t really watched as many videos as usual this last week, still the decision to pick one as my favourite was nearly impossible and I really should have given it more thought, before going out on a limb on this series. The videos that I’ll list here are all excellent videos in my opinion. All are in their own way totally different and lay different emphasis on different things.

Continue reading Videos? Love ’em II

Videos? Love ’em

I’m fascinated with videos. I’d love to be able to make my own, that I’m satisfied with. I think I lack the ability and organisation and endurance to plan a shot though. I mean I’ve done, or well tried to do daily vlogs and they were all really unplanned, boring even.

I was uncomfortable with asking people I knew, if they’re okay with being filmed. Such a simple question really. Two friends in particular have asked me not to film them (which is understandable), so it’s made it harder to film the things that go on around me, in addition to not having a general plan.

Even with the Video for the ISOC that was a problem, to the point that I don’t know whether I should put the video on private or public, as it is at the moment. Especially with all the legal consequences that could theoretically arise should a person in the video tell me, that he didn’t want to appear in it. I should probably check out the laws involved, but as I understand from last time I checked up on it, they said it would be okay to film any person that is and can be seen in a public sphere. Whether the University grounds are public is a different question.

Any way, that wasn’t really what I wanted to write about.

Videos unmistakably capture a moment whether good or bad and relay these to us, the viewers. Tell us a story or just look great. There are so many different cool videos out there. The success of YouTube and other sites like Vimeo, show us how much they have become part of our internet lives.

I think I do watch quite a unhealthy amount of videos, whenever I’m not out and not doing something with the family or reading (whether online or offline) you can probably guess what I’m doing.

Normally I’d watch a video, and go on to another without really thinking about it afterwards. What I’d like to do is showcase once a week my favourite video and maybe talk or write a bit about why I found that particular video so great.  I’ll do two categories, one Islam related video and one that fits everything else.

Regarding the Islam related videos, I’m quite hooked onto everything Nouman Ali Khan posts. I’m subscribed to Bayyinah, and so it is quite possible that one of those is my fav video of the week, Islam related. In that case I might write about that video, but post my 2nd favourite video.

Please forgive me if I miss out on a week or something, I guess I’m not known for writing something regularly.

That all said, here is the first video, my fav of the day if you will, not really Islam related, but well just watch it.

Wa Salam,


In a boring materials lecture

I wanna be free, not tied by the head, shoulders, knees and toes.

I’m shackled to my desk trying to get this of my chest.

Lectures, conjectures, figuring out crazy inscriptions, mathematics, logic, psychotics.

Wanting to just shut my mind off, stop thinking, just go with the flow.

I wanna be free, like a bird, a falcon or an eagle soaring high in the sky.

Flying over fields of grass, so low my feet graze the straws, or so high grazing the stars becomes a possibility.

I’d hide out in a hut made out of straws and mud in the rainforest, a fortress just for me, imagine soldiers trying to take over my wall of boulders.

A gust of cold wind flutters in, drops of water splatters on my face. I bring my wings further in, tightly around my body. Feeling just a little bit lonely. I seriously need a hobby or a mate, Anyway. Doesn’t matter. I’m so tired. Sleep.

The sun is shining, so hot,  so blinding, my feathers ruffled and I’m so puzzled/dazzled. An oasis, water in the faaaaaaar, or not. I cannot bare this any longer, I might die from hunger. Scavenger over me.

A caravan passing by, with its different pots and pans, spices and fragrances, drums and Baskets full of water! Their cloth and jewelry. I follow the drums and night breaks in. A big fire is lit, stories are told and shared, drums hit. I listen to the sweet poetry and  quietly drift off into the night, belly filled.

I’d spread my wings, a storm brewing up, strong gusts of wind the waves high. A ship riding on the waves, like a roller-coaster. Th next minute everything is calm a lazy gust wraps itself around my feathers like a soft hug.

I reach the coast, large riffs, a light tower in the distance. A fisher boat floating on the water, fishing lines overboard. One of my cousins snaps up a fish still flapping on the deck. Full beak ahead. I’m pretty hungry myself. Watching the sun set in the water, the stars singing hello. Clouds brewing up, a stronger wind waves now, it starts to drizzle, even colder now. It starts to snow, the white glitter, stuck in my feathers glittering in the light of street lamps. My feathers frozen. I land near a large window, a bit warmer now. Inside a family of 7 sitting around the television watching Lilo and Stitch. A baby laughing in the lap of her father, wildly reaching in the air, staring at me, with her cute eyes. And 2 older girls, one seemingly about to sleep on the legs of her father , the other watching with rapt attention, now laughing out loud at the scene her brothers are making. A reenactment in big style. The whole family falls to giggling.

Sooo, I won’t go into a new topic today, that’s the end of the lesson. Do you have any questions? Okay, you’re free to go.


Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar

A brother calling to the prayer.

Cough cough.

Another brother having passed on leading the prayer, coughing in the background, trying to concentrate. I call out Allahu Akbar.


Iyyaka na’budu

Oh Allah I have committed myself to be Your ‘Abd, Your slave, You are my Master.

wa iyyaka nasta’in

Oh Allah now that I have committed myself to be Your slave, I will worship only You. Seek only you for help in everything.

ihdina sirat al mustakim

Oh Allah I’m Your slave and I worship only You, but Oh Allah, I need Guidance. I need it so much, Ya Allah. Guide me…

And so every prayer begins, we seek for guidance in every single of our prayers, whether fardh (obligatory) or not. We as humans are so weak, so miskeen, that we need reminders over and over and over again. The bombardment, from outside sometimes just gets that much, that one finds it hard to hold on.

As salamu alaikum wa rahmatullah

“As salamu alaikum, how are you?” I ask the only brother left. We got into a long and good conversation. From the Omar ra. series on Youtube, to using gold and silver again as money, the economy and from the End of Time nearing and its unmissable signs to what we are studying, discipline, the military and advice.

That was what I needed, this little conversation, I believe that may have been the answer to my plead for Guidance. Allahu A’lam (Allah knows best) what will happen until the next prayer, where I will if given the chance again plead for guidance and then again at the next. InshaAllah (If Allah wills)

Wa Salam,


Unmosqued – Trailers



There are a lot of good points raised in these trailers and I’m generally excited for this film to come out. These issues are epidemic across our Ummah(community) at this point in time. Things will have to change in the next 5-10 years otherwise we will have totally empty mosques across countries and borders. Mosques generally are not where they were supposed to be, in the middle of family life.

I dream of the mosque as the center of the Muslim Community, with a hospital, lectures, library, soup kitchen, Youth programs etc. available to everyone. Eco-friendly, giving back to the wider community. It doesn’t have to be fancy but be cut towards what the community actually needs. What we as youth need. Because in the end it is often the youth that shake things up, whether at the time of the Prophet saw. or now. How are we going to raise Muslims that are attached to their deen, if the mosque is not at the centre of our lives. As always I speak to myself first before anyone else.

On the trailers again, there were some things that I didn’t agree with, however they’re their opinions and I respect them. With this kind of video you probably are going to step on some toes.

I’m interested in the reactions to the video, the discussion maybe even rants…

In all of this, however we should not forget to appreciate the work that the elders have done. I remember that during a youth session at my local mosque we wanted to watch a little film coupled with a reminder. As the guys set up an older brother stood up and in his broken English tried to tell us that this is not what the mosque should be used for. Out of adab and respect the brothers who organised it, decided to stop it.

One of the brothers went even further and mashaAllah praised the older brother who was about 60-70ish.

Both brothers are an inspiration to me. The elder, you can see every day for almost every Salah walking back and forth from his house to the Mosque. The younger in his adab and respect for the elderly.

I pray that the video has a positive effect, if any, on people. May Allah bless the project and effort. Amin.

Wa Salam,




Salam guys do you remember my schedule? Yeah? No? Me neither. A few months back I told myself that I would upload at least 3 posts per week and 1 video every day.

At the end of Ramadan, I had the idea to document my year up to Ramadan this year on video and I started this after my exams but had a lot of breaks similar with my posts here on the blog.

So, 3 posts per week, sounds quite a lot to me now but I want to get there. For the next few weeks I’m going to take it slow though, with 2 posts and whatever else my mind churns out.


Wa Salam.

A series of events

It is Wednesday the 27th of March, until this evening everything was fine, no problems at all, everything ran smoothly like a smooth milkshake down my throat. Then my sister comes downstairs and tells me my “Ntldr is missing, press crtl+Alt+del to restart.” I promptly chase after her a tickling fight ensues. After which I check on my laptop, and find my “Ntldr is missing” indeed not just that my Operating System can’t be found either.

OS can't be found


Turns out the computer can’t find my hard drive though the bios does, it means that there actually is a chance of fixing it but I’ve given up finding the solution. From Knoppix and testdisk to a dos flash usb  and a bios update that doesn’t execute. So anyway, long story short, I’ve tried a lot of things. Didn’t get much sleep and the sleep I did get was on my brothers mattress which he switched out for mine when I was in Bradford…it hurts.

Then tonight the 28th, I had the bright idea to go to Hell Night, well it turned out to be one I called out to Allah a couple hundred times, I felt so sick. Well let me explain first. Hell Night is one night during the week filled with muscle and strength training for a solid three hours.

Well having not taken part in a Hell Night in about half a year I was quite a bit rusty and overdid it from the start so that about ten minutes in I was ready to throw up, felt dizzy and needed to sit down.

So I did ten  minutes resting I felt okay again wanted to at least do some things so I got into a routine of one exercise and about 20 minutes of resting. That went on until I had a bright Idea again, to do the chicken walk that we all have a love/hate relationship with. Across a distance of around 30-50 meters and then a set of stairs up.

At around the middle of that step I couldn’t go on stood up nearly fell backwards and sat down, got down from the raised step onto the ground on top of the stairs and laid down till I nearly froze took some time getting some heat back into my body. Alhamdulillah I survived. Need to make sure to eat the right thing and take it slow.

Wa Salam,